Section: Features

Kenyon Kupid shoots Valentine’s Day arrows across the Hill

For Kenyon students seeking either a romantic or platonic companion to spend Valentine’s Day with, a matchmaking angel has arrived in the shape of Kermit the Frog.

On Jan. 20, the Instagram account @kenyonkupid, represented by the famous frog, announced the project’s third run since its start in 2022. The process of finding love on the Hill is made simple: you fill out a form designed to gauge your interests and personality, and on the morning of Valentine’s Day, Kupid’s arrow will connect you with your match.

“We hope Kenyon Kupid fosters a feeling that we’re all here to make friends and spread love even in the most unexpected of places, and that it’s never too late to form a new bond at Kenyon!” the anonymous frog wrote in an email to the Collegian.

Kenyon Kupid is not the first project intended to spread love on campus. Introduced around the same time as Kenyon Kupid was the Marriage Pact. Part of a nationwide project, it promised to find your best-suited match and afterward, participants were left to determine whether they wanted to form a marriage pact — an agreement to marry each other if both remained single years later. 

“Marriage Pact was our first love,” Kupid the Frog confessed. However, there was one crucial difference between the two projects’ approaches — the Marriage Pact was algorithm-based, while Kenyon Kupid hand-matches all their hopeful lovebirds. As the anonymous frog phrased it, “The loving hand of Kupid doth transcend technological advancement.”

Not only is the process simple, but it is also packed with fun: the form consists of both practical questions such as hobbies and deal breakers, and imaginary scenarios such as “Someone puts a crying baby in your arms. What lullaby are you singing to lull them to peace? (For context, you are at Arby’s).” The creative questions reveal a good deal of over 200 respondents’ preferences and personalities. 

The pool contained lovers and yearners of all stripes, but Kupid managed to glean a few unifying traits: “Of our 240 respondents, a majority have an anxious-preoccupied attachment style, prefer to enjoy a cold one with the boys and have coffee and a walk for their ideal first hangout. We would hang out with all of our applicants if we could, but we are literally a frog, and we are so afraid of getting stepped on.”

What if Cupid’s arrow has already struck and there’s a particular person on your mind? Kupid also takes care of that. The form asks for that person’s name, and if that person’s responses are compatible with yours, you two become a pairing. And, if somewhere on the Hill, you’ve found your first loathe, Kupid can help to keep you two apart.

In response to the question of what makes two people compatible, Kenyon Kupid wrote: “Oftentimes, it comes down to similar values and interests, similar senses of humor or how they would respond in demanding situations — and that’s for platonic and romantic relationships alike. Other times, pairings come to us in prophetic visions sent by Mother Frog.” 

Occasionally, if Kenyon Kupid is doing its job too well, the staff will get responses from people who were matched with someone they are already very close to such as longtime friends, or roommates. In such cases, Kenyon Kupid will provide a re-match. 

By the time this article is published, Kupid the Frog will have already finished distributing their arrows. For all the romantic hopefuls who will have participated, Kupid has an important message:

“Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection / The lovers, the dreamers and me.”

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